I Prayed for This.

Sometimes in the moments of our most blissful of times, something just seems off or odd. I hate that feeling of uncertainty and not knowing the direction I should take. So the time comes when I have to bring it up with my Father in Heaven. He knows best. 

Before.

My dad has this quote on his desk that says: 

"After all is said and done, was there more said than done?"

It was surely something different when you realize more was said than done. And I hate that. I hate not knowing or doing what I could've or should've. I want to honor my Heavenly Father and his will, so indeed I think we need to listen to what he says! 

In the beginning, it's easy to stand up and say you will follow His will. 

During.

It's hard in the moment of trial or test to see why or the reason that God would put us through something or why He would put it in the timing he did. The worst is that before you knew something was off and you prayed for strength and help. But when the moment comes, it's hard to fathom. 

The best part is though, that even the trial totally and completely blows, our Heavenly Father and Savior and Redeemer are right there beside us. They know, see, and understand every ache and pain and suffering we go through. We prayed for help and strength and answers, but like many things we cannot immediately know the Father's will for us. 

After.

Welp! It's over. You survived the next stepping stone on your journey back to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. But it's not over really. We remember the things we went through and then we help others. We move on and remember that we were not alone in our moments of despair and will not leave others in theirs. We Prayed for This. 

~Mostly Marissa~

And now because I'm on my way back from DIDNEYLAND (yes I spelled it like that on purpose!) I will post some of the pictures that are already uploaded from this crazy adventure! 

(I went on our Band/Choir tour to Disneyland as a journalist--booyah!)

On our way!!

Sleepless in Barstow

Riverside City College

NEWSIES!!! It was as fabulous as one would expect.

Even if we had time to only see like one star, I'm so glad it was Billy Joel. That guy is like my idol. He da real MVP. 

Selfies at their finest.

One of the many, many attractive actors/singers/dancers from Newsies.

Disney knows whats up! ;)

Zaque, our little super star. #moodsofZaque 

Maybe I'll do a blog post about Didneyland someday. I have about a bajillion and one pictures. But the tour has been preeettttyyyy great. 

The Love Yourself Revolution.

Okay, I'm not going to lie. I've been super excited for this post! It's been a work in progress for a few weeks, but I'm thrilled to share with you what I've found!

Perfectly Taboo.

I think as a girl there's some pretty fantastic things about it. We can nurture, care, and I feel the  satisfaction in sitting and helping someone through their issues. 

But there's always the evident things about being a girl that is just *taboo.

*Taboo: not acceptable to talk about or do

But nothing should be taboo about loving ourselves. We should be confident in the person we are becoming and show that we love ourselves the way we are and only change to become a better person. Let's break the barrier of not being okay with ourselves. 

Some Marissaly Advice:

For the Girls:

I'll just say it. Don't listen to the turds in life. They are lame. They haven't a clue what they are talking about. They are talking behind your back for a reason. You're beautiful! Nobody, absolutely nobody can tell you who you can and can't be. Be you and only you. Keep your head up and smile/laugh/snort laugh! Because life is good and you are great. Love yourself, and if you don't already love yourself; learn to love yourself.

Don't worry about boys and what they think. They can be awesome, but sometimes they can be lame. Trust in the one who atoned for your sins so long ago, and everything else will fall in place. 

For that male gender.

Alright guys, sometimes you bring us girls to frustration levels. But you're also pretty great. So do something for us;

-Honor our standards and yours.

-Compliment us--I assure you that no girl will turn you down for a compliment. We consistently hear from friends and mothers how beautiful we are but it becomes more real and sincere when it's from a brother or friend. There is no negative connotation to it! Just do it!

You Aren't Alone.

Every girl I know has struggled with loving herself. It can be big or small, but at one point or another we struggle with who we are and it's rough. But we are not alone. We can lift each other in ways that are unimaginable and can help each other through the best and the worst of times. We are girls! We rock! 

Sneaky, Sneaky. 

Ok so a few months back I was sitting in the temple when a girl and someone who would probably be her mother or grandmother were talking about trials and becoming better. A talk was read (which for the life of me I can't remember who's talk it was, but it was amazing nonetheless.) There was a wall separating us, and I'm pretty sure they knew/didn't really know that I was sitting there. I don't even know the women who were there but they were truly amazing to me. I don't even know or maybe can't even fathom the trials they may have been through, but I do know how much their Savior and Redeemer loves them and wants the best for them through all the trials. Here were some amazing things I heard;

"Through everything I've been through, I think I've lost me somewhere in there. I'm trying to find myself again."

"This thing is over. It's past. It's time to move forward."

"He [Christ] wants you to take the hard in your life and make it good."

It's pretty hard to believe the kind of person you can become when life and Satan get in your way. But Satan doesn't know what he's talking about. We're pretty fantastic individuals. And Satan can't even come close to how great we are.

So the Challenge was Accepted.

I asked some of the greatest girls I know to help me out for this post and tell me what they love about themselves. I absolutely adore these girls, they are amazing! I couldn't even ask all the girls I know but the response has been overwhelming. I just asked them to say something they loved about themselves. I asked and they surely delivered and I couldn't agree more with them. 

Destinie Comeau: Well my writing is my life and I have to say that I'm pretty proud of it. :)

Rachel Feeney: I love my sense of style. :) I'm super picky about what I wear but a lot of times I mix and match colors and it typically looks good.

Faith Perkins: I've got grit. 👊💪

ShaeLyn Heaps: I love that I am able to see the good in everyone when others might be quick to judge. I always look to see another person's point of view and try to understand what they've been through that's made them who they are. I'm really grateful for this ability because I think its really a blessing to be able to better understand someone and allow them to have someone to come to they know they can trust. :)

Ashlyn Arrington: One of the most important things I like about myself is having the gospel in my life and being able to grow up learning about it! It's not something that everyone is blessed to have but I love the gospel and love my Savior! Another thing I like it my ability to dance! Dance is my most favorite thing to do and to do it well is a huge blessing and I LOVE it! Being able to make a difference in someone's life through dance is amazing! Then something I like in my appearance is my eyes! I like having blue eyes and blonde hair! I get a lot of compliments on those things and I think that is what makes me beautiful!!:)

Kayla Costley: I think that I like how well I include others around me. :)

Morgan Chase: I like that I can laugh at the fact that im short, some people get offended when people tell them they are short because they dont like being short. but it gives me a new outlook on life:)

Jerra Fowers: Something I have always loved about myself is that I don't have to dress like a model or wear clothes worth a million dollars to feel beautiful, but I can make myself feel beautiful by being around others. I never wear make up and when I do, it's for a special occasion. I think that too many girls are so worried about how they look over their character. Clothes, make-up, and shoes will only last so long, but the relationships we build with each other now will last even when we are apart. T shirts and basketball shorts may not be in style, but being a good person will never run out of style.

Whitney Wray: I really like my personality :)

Emily Hales: I love that I am able to play the piano :)

Abby McFarland: I like my ability to play volleyball:)

Emily Haws: Um I love my high arches on my feet-other dancers always tell me they want my feet.

Maddy Smith: I like to run and do track

Kenzie Isaacson: I like that I'm a good listener.

Kylie Howes: I love to draw

Aspen Chase: I'm always happy. :)

I suppose I should include myself in this: I love that one of my greatest strengths is also one of my greatest weaknesses--I know it's a weird thing--but I'm confident of myself. I love that I know (for the most part) I know my goals and where I want to go. There's no question to who I want to be, and I always want to be the person to make others confident of themselves. Even if it's hard for me to be confident of the person I am or am becoming, I know if I have my goals, thoughts, and Savior in mind, there's no question to the road I need to go down. 

The Love Yourself Revolution.

So join me. Love yourself. It's the best decision you'll ever make. It's not going to be easy everyday, but it'll surely be worth it. It's your first step on your journey to being forever happy. 

Be sure to take a picture of yourself and post it with the hashtag #theloveyourselfrevolution

~Full of Smiles~

Forget Yo'self!

Some weeks it's amazing that you can make it out in one piece. I'll be completely honest and say that at this beginning of this week I was completely selfish. I was worried what was going on in my life and was too self consumed. God changed that real fast.

No longer my time. 

It's an amazing feeling when your time is no longer yours. God seems to be able to show us what really matters in the perfect-yet not so perfect-timing. And as strange as it is, it's great not having to worry about yourself anymore but rather see others the way our Heavenly Father would have us see them. It's not our timing that things occur in our lives when and where they do. But it's not on our account, it's God's.

Something that's hard to grasp.

One night, I was laying in my bed thinking how this was going to work out for me or how that is going to work out for me. Then I get a text from my best friend. She was asking us to pray and fast for another friend who would need the comfort of Christ. Then EVERYTHING changed. Everything that was about me, me, me just seconds ago changed to help, help, help. 

My friends are simply amazing. They really are. They go through things that I cannot even fathom but handle them with such grace and strength and look to the Lord in everything. No longer could I not sleep because of my selfish desires but rather how to help out someone in need. 

And even though my dear friend is going through something that she is handling with such strength, I have complete confidence that our Heavenly Father is working his magic up there and doing something that's best for her. Even if my heart aches for the situation she has been put in, I KNOW that this is something not only she is supposed to learn something from, but me as well. She is amazing and has such a positive attitude about life and everything that she is faced with. I admire her strength. 

Falling in and out of place.

I don't have a doubt in my mind that even though that everything was seemingly falling apart, it really was falling into place. In the darkest and most confusing of times of our lives, God is not leaving us helpless or lonely. He's there and it's time to do something about it. 

He is preparing us for something that is greater than we can ever understand. These trials that hit us right in the gut that seem like we can't walk or go any further, are preparing us for bigger and better things. We have to trust that if we keep walking (and sometimes stumbling) through it all, it will work out for OUR good.

Can't get it out of my mind. 

On one of the hardest of days, I couldn't for the life of me get this scripture out of my mind. But I know it helped me so much to get through the day. And bonus: it's scripture mastery!!

D&C 6:36

God is there friends. He will never leave us comfortless but sometimes we just need to Forget Yo'self and look to those we can comfort with the testimony of our Savior and King.

~Full of Smiles~

Now for some wicked photos of the good times this week even if it felt like this...

God must have a sense of humor for those hard days when you're scrolling through your news feed and see this!

Spontaneous sugar cookie making sesh. I dig Mike's face in this. 

Betcha can't guess which one(s) Mike chose to put down and which cookie cutter she wanted.

Even though this kid is more of an annoying little sister to me, bosses me around,  or pokes me in the face when I'm trying to sleep, I wouldn't change her for anything. I love this stinker. 

Hehe

I kinda don't really know. 

PAW PRINT!!! This people rock. Amazing advisor, editors, and journalists and we can all pull together to make a killer newspaper. 

The dang big pizza. Those slices were larger than my face. And yes we are using the selfie stick. #yourtypicalasian

When all the plates are gone...I present to you pizza in a cup. Pretty nifty actually.

The darndest best muffins I'd ever seen.

Because when it FLIPPIN FINALLY FRIDAY a F'real is definitely deserved with the bestie. 

When you go onto disneychannel.com without your parents permission...

#rebellife

I heart this. And not just because sharpies are amazing, but it is simply put. 

Prom was preeeettttyy great. Thanks Alex for asking me! Here's to the prom squad. 

And basically Luke's face describes how happy I was when I got a 4.0 for this quarter. Not too shabby for missing about 3 weeks from being sick to the amazing trip to Taiwan. Almost had an Asian freak out moment when I could've gotten a 3.9. #no4.0norice

Little Things.

It's crazy how the smallest of things can have the greatest of impact. A few of my favorite things are just the weirdest and oddest of things as well.

I love strange things, like words that just sound silly. Just try it. I have a little list in my head of weird words. Like taco, hufflepuff, scrumptious, and plenty of others.

One of the greater things that happened today was being able to go to the Lotus Park branch in our stake and see the chorister and how happy he was to fulfill his calling and share the gift of music. Or even Kenzie doing so great on her talk and being confident of herself and share her testimony without even writing it down.

Another little thing is the ability my mom has to sense when I've had a rough day. She talks me through it and holds me while I complain to her and sob because I'm a highschooler where life just isn't fair sometimes. She helps me see that we grow from our trials and how we handle them and that it's okay to be upset but we should make something better from the pain we feel. I love her.

But one of the greatest little things, was finding out for myself the power and impact that personal scripture study and prayer has in my life. I remember in ninth grade, I first attended seminary and the challenge was extended to study the scriptures and pray everyday. At first, it was more of a daily thing to just get it done and get the numbers up. But as time went on, I realized when I missed a day it made a big impact on me. I didn't want to miss anymore days and even the days where I couldn't completely understand what the words were saying, I realized that I didn't want to miss any days where I felt the feeling and inspiration that was there when I studied and prayed.

Sometimes the Little Things have the greatest impact in our lives, and it only takes one day and one step to start the greatest journey.

~Full of Smiles~

Just a few photos from this past week!

After Satan's Test a.k.a the ACT we had an Ebelskiver party (pancake balls) afterwards at my house. I love that the guys take charge when it comes to making food. First fry night, then this. They're great. 

We had New Beginnings! We didn't feel like making anything so we ordered cookies...well they sure look cute but they're basically Diabetus cookies. No really. Like sugar infested cookies that could give you a slight heart attack. 

Shopping with these weirdos. I swear they really were happy at one point. 

Does anybody remember those old water games where you push the buttons and try to get the rings to land on the stick things? Well my mom got Mike and Kaz each one, so naturally I had to steal it and play. Turns out, if you push the buttons super fast and hard you can get a lot of the rings on...just don't show Mike, then she just wants you to keep getting the rings on certain ones for approximately the next 5.3 hours. 

Trust Him.

This past week in seminary we were showed this video.

God knows exactly what he is doing. I can't even say it enough. And simply we have to be cut down so he can build us up again.

One of my favorite things to highlight in my scriptures is always something along the lines of "the will of God." Friends, it doesn't even matter what we think is best for us. God always knows. He has always known. And will always know. He's got our back on anything, but is also guiding us to the course we should take.

Now get on your knees and pour your heart out to him. You're good times, your bad, your silly mistakes. All of it. He's always there. He's always going to be there. And he's going to make you a better person if you let him.

Trust Him.


Now lets take a minute to appreciate my current jam. This song is fan-flippin-tastic! Also, this remix version by Alex Boyé is on point. Check it.


http://youtu.be/rjRlJvOxIY0

When you go to the mall for a SINGLE store...and it's out of business. Curse you.

Temple Tuesday! 

I love this weirdo. And yes I do realize my eyes look completely closed in this.

Because people amaze me. 

I didn't want to study for my test yet, so I pulled out my old yearbook. Nothing has changed with my friends. I love them still. 

"Hey! I'm back. HAFS (Have a fun summer) Yep that's right. 

-Bryan James Gittins"

I feel like he would still say this to me.

"Nolan Howes is sooooo nice :)"

I'm pretty sure this is when I was still convinced he was a French exchange student...long story. 

Oh Chris. Still sporting those stick figures.

I wasn't friends with Tanner much as this point, but I still feel like this explains our friendship somehow.

Aaaaannnnnddd selfie.

Post dance party thug lyfe. 

She got stuck and was crying...so I took a picture.

I now present to you the evolution of Kaz.

Happy baby...

Squirmy...

Boom. Kaz grumpy face.

We both have the same Batman shirt. We both argue over who can wear it on Friday. We both wear it anyways. #realfriends

There's this tradition in the Barnes family; when a kid has a birthday all the others within a 20 year life span of the same age of the kid (sometimes even older) have to stand behind the birthday boy/girl for a picture during the candle blowing. So when there was the birthday party for Keith and Karen, we made the adults stand behind them. Oh how the tables have turned. #revengeissweet

Bae status. 

Betos for breakfast! I only gained approximately 10 pounds and had a small heart attack. But totally worth it. 

I just have the strangest things come up on my Pandora station. Basically the guy on the left looks entirely uncomfortable while the other is completely into the awkward position. 

FRY NIGHT WITH THE BESTIES!!! So fun. So fattening. Sooooo good. I love that we always include food with our parties. And I love even more that the boys are super excited about frying things.

Chris putting more filling in the deep fried Twinkie. 

Oh look, it's a dragon fly shaped onion ring(s). 

Great but looooonnngg week. So glad I had the family, friends, Savior and brother, and Heavenly Father I did to get through it all. Life is grand.

~Full of Smiles~